PseudoHinata
by Serenity Hidden
Summary: or Naruto oniisan. This I plan to be progress for Hinata's feelings. Naruto finds out her feelings and has to deal with them. Revenge for Hinata! Blushing and embarrasment on both parts.
1. Chapter 1

Dedicated to Team 8 and the wackiness ensuing.

I don't own Nartuto. If I did, then Hinata would have told Naruto her feelings a whole lot faster.

Pseudo-Hinata

Naruto stared off into the distance over the Hokage monument. He felt dumb, not to mention a little guilty. Sakura had just told him that Hinata had a big crush on him after Hinata had fainted for the 50th time because he had hugged her when she had told Team 7 that she would be joining their squad.

_He had started to protest initially, "Since Sasuke would be back soon, so there would be no need of a replacement for him!" when Sakura had kicked him in the shin. As he hopped around on one foot, Sakura told Hinata sweetly that she looked forward to working with her, and that she was glad that Hinata could be the one to join them. _

_Embarrassed, Hinata had been looking at the ground and thus had no forewarning when Naruto, prompted by Sakura, had given her an awkward hug and apologized. Stunned, her face had turned hot enough to fry an egg on and she promptly fainted. _

_Smacking him on the head, Sakura dragged him away from where he was trying in vain to wake Hinata up and hissed in his ear, "You are a total idiot! First you make it seem like she's not wanted, then you go and make her faint!" She took a calming breath, "Alright Naruto, I'm only gonna say this once so listen up." When he nodded, she said in a clear voice so that he couldn't possibly misunderstand her, "Hinata has had a huge crush on you for as long as I can remember. That_'_s why she gets embarrassed around you so easily. Get it, numbskull?" _

_Stammering, not believing his ears, he parroted, "H... Hinata likes me?!" _

"_Well duh, that's what I just said. She only blushes every time she catches your eye, not to mention fainting every time you get too close!" _

"_I just thought she had a cold or something," he mumbled, embarrassed. _

_Hinata made a small sound as she began to wake up and they both glanced towards her. _

"_Shit, she's starting to wake up. Look," she sighed then glared fiercely at him, "meet me at Ichiraku's this evening. I'll tell you the rest there." Naruto could only stare at her. There was more?! _

_Looking skeptically at his bewildered face, she sighed and said, "You. Me. Ichiraku's. This evening. Got it?" Utterly confused, he said, "Like a date?" Sakura face-palmed. "No, like a briefing. Jeez, one track mind."_

_Grabbing his face and turning it to look at her from where Naruto had been staring at Hinata, she said, "Just meet me there. I'll explain there." Not quite understanding, Naruto smiled and nodded. This had been one of Iruka-sensei's more useful pieces of advice. When in doubt, smile and nod. This had gotten him out of many compromising situations. _

_Nor did it fail him this time. He heaved a sigh of relief as Sakura released her hold on his face and set off across the rooftops. It had not escaped his notice that her free hand had been straying towards her kunai holder. _

_He froze as she turned around and shouted, "And you're paying!" He nodded as she kept running without even looking to ascertain that he had heard. _

He had spent the rest of the afternoon in a daze, after having apologized to Hinata in a restrained manner that had her looking at him oddly.

_Hinata likes me? But she's so pretty, in a quiet sort of way. Surely she can do better._ Although when he thought about it, she really did get embarrassed too easily by him in particular to be just shy. And he did remember her being always somewhere in his peripheral vision when he was younger and still at the Ninja Academy. Was it possible that she had liked him even then? Anything seemed plausible in the light of today's revelations. And apparently Sakura had still more to tell him.

He frowned. Maybe it had been a trifle crude to ask Sakura if it was a date when she had just told him that someone else liked him, but he did still have a little crush on her from Ninja Academy.

_Even if since then he had realized that she didn't care about him at all and probably never would, he still liked her. After all, wasn't that was love is? Devotion without reservation and wanting them to be happy. _He laughed, _that made him sound like one of Akamaru's relatives, a puppy dog that followed Sakura around_, but it was true.

Even if she could never love him back, he wanted her to be happy.

* * *

Sakura sprang from rooftop to rooftop towards her home. She fumed with anger. _Sometimes Naruto could be so annoying, like a devoted puppy that wouldn't stop following her._ Looking to the sky, she cried, "Haven't I told him that I'm not interested?" She frowned, _well she had never told him exactly like that, but he should be able to get the idea with her punching him all the time._

She felt a twinge of guilt; she knew that Naruto only let her hit him because he liked her. _Did taking advantage of that mean that she was a bitch like Ino sometimes called her?_

She certainly knew that she acted like one sometimes, especially when she was punishing Naruto. _But that was different,_ she justified, _he just won't leave me alone! _Somewhere a small part of her whispered, _That's one of the things you like best about him. _Ignoring it, she grabbed the brace of kunai hanging on the wall and went outside for a little target practice.

She sent kunai flying through the air at the targets, and did a back flip in midair. Landing on her feet, she saw that she had hit all the bull's eyes on the targets. Restless, she gathered her kunai silently from the targets and prepared to throw them again. Her mind strayed to what Naruto had said earlier and was infuriated all over again. _How could Hinata possibly like him when he was so insensitive?_ She scowled and threw the kunai with a trifle more force then necessary. She winced and sighed as the kunai buried themselves halfway up to the handles in the oaken targets, which had been on the trees for so long that they had started to grow around the targets.

One of the targets, which had been dented and pitted by generations of shinobi, split in two pieces as she pried the kunai out. She watched them fall; fascinated by the way time had slowed down… And then had sped up as she realized that they were about to fall on her sandal-clad foot. She yanked her foot out of the way as fast as she could, but they still bruised her right foot, which was already bandaged from some glass she had stepped on. She had done her best, but there were limits on how much you can heal yourself.

Stifling a shriek of pain, she stared at her foot, and felt tears begin to well up in her eyes. For some reason, the broken target could have symbolized her whole life. Given attention only when convenient, and only when she was useful to them, now they had abandoned her and left her broken. And now she was hurting the ones around her.

_Despite his faults, thank Kami for Naruto, _she thought gratefully,_ at least he didn't abandon me. He hasn't even said I told you so, despite him knowing from the start that S…Sasuke wasn't good for me. _She knew that she wasn't really mad at Naruto; she just despised all men that could disregard a girl's feelings. Sasuke had ignored _her_ feelings too. She shook her head. But she was over him. And she felt like Naruto was her little brother, not a romantic option.

So, it would be sad, but Naruto would always be slotted into the "Just Friends" category.

* * *

Hinata blushed just thinking about what had happened between Naruto and her that afternoon. Despite her intrusion, Naruto had _hugged_ her, and had said he was glad that she had been the one assigned to join them, when in fact, she had volunteered when it had become clear that Team 7 was missing a necessary member and 3rd chunin to complete the team.

Kiba and Shino had argued against it, Kiba in particular, but since this was the only thing that she had ever asked for herself so they eventually gave in. Kurenai, on the other hand, had given her an odd look and asked, "Are you sure this is what you want?" When Hinata had nodded timidly, Kurenai had sighed and given her consent. But not before giving a word of warning. "This reassignment will be permanent. You won't be able to run away." Hinata flushed, _did Kurenai really have that low an opinion of her_, but nodded decisively. But it seemed that her hopes of getting to know Naruto better were crushed before they had a chance.

It was obvious that Naruto still liked Sakura. And yet… Her mind drifted to the conversation she had overheard between them earlier that day… _Something _had changed.

_As Hinata had slowly begun to regain consciousness, she had become aware that voices were talking nearby. When she heard Naruto say her name, she stirred and opened her eyes. Wincing at the bright light, she distinctly heard Sakura's voice say, "Meet me at Ichiraku's this evening." Then Naruto had said, "Like a date?!" Sakura had said something indistinct, likely a curse from what Hinata knew of Sakura's nature, then the wind blew the rest of her sentence to Hinata's ears. "…one track mind." _

Hinata bit her lip. _Was it possible that Sakura_ _had asked Naruto on a date? Sure Naruto had shown interest in Sakura and had asked her out several times, but Sakura had never accepted before. But then, _she reflected bitterly,_ now that Sasuke was gone, there was nothing to stop Sakura from going on a date with Naruto. _The thought of it sent a pang of pain to heart, and her eyes began to fill with tears_. Of course,_ she mused_, why wouldn't Naruto like Sakura. She's pretty, and smart, and confidant…_

Everything Hinata had been told since birth that she was not. She curled up into a fetal position and began to rock back and forth. _Of course Naruto wouldn't like me._ Her eyes brimming, she blinked and a tear escaped to trace the outline of her cheek. She gave a choking sob… _Of course he wouldn't. _

She angrily wiped away the tear and slumped against the wall_. I knew from the start that they'd resent intrusion… a…and Naruto wouldn't be any more likely to accept me…._ Her chin quivered stubbornly. _But I have to at least try!_

* * *

Staring absently into the distance, Naruto was surprised to find that the sun was setting. _Oh no! I'm gonna be late for my first date!_ Panicking, he jumped from the from the top of the cliff, and sprinted towards the village.

A villager who had been standing at the foot of the Hokage monument stared after the village prankster in disbelief. It had been at least a 40 foot drop from the top of the cliff to the ground. He would have liked to think he imagined it, but he could never have imagined the lurid orange jumpsuit that distinguished the ever-present threat lurking inside the prankster that had scored the lowest points on the ninja exam.

Reaching Ichiraku's, he looked around, expecting to see Sakura waiting for him. Disappointed not to see her, he slouched into the booth. Surprised to see him in such dismal spirits, the old man raised an eyebrow. _Must be girl trouble. Nothing else could bring the Naruto I know down._ Aloud he said "What can I get ya today Naruto? I hope this time your wallet's full."

"Yep, it is. Anyway, I'll just wait, thanks." The hair on the back of Ichiraku's neck stiffened. Never before had Naruto turned down food! Suspicious, he peered at Naruto's face. What he saw there sent a chill down his spine.

The expression on Naruto's face was… patience! Watching Naruto closely from the corner of his eye as he turned back to the simmering broth pot, he said casually, "Are you sure you won't have anything? I've a new recipe I haven't tried out yet." Startled from his reverie,Naruto replied, "Nah, I'll just wait for Sakura." The old man nearly fell over from shock. The whole village knew about Naruto's unrequited crush on Sakura. _If Sakura's finally given in…. It could change everything!_ Fishing for information, he asked nonchalantly, "So what should I prepare for your new girlfriend?"

Naruto blinked, stunned by the assumption. Even he had never assumed that going on one 'date' (even if it was about Hinata) would equal having a girlfriend.

He puffed up his chest and bragged, "Yeah, I know everything about her. She'll have the …" He was cut off by a smack on the head by Sakura, who had just arrived.

"I'll have one order of miso ramen. And why are you encouraging him? He'd probably have gotten the pork ramen for me!" She said in an outraged manner. Naruto's eyes widened. _How did she know what I was going to say?_ He wondered. Turning to him Sakura exclaimed, "Because it was written all over your face. You are an open book. Every thought flits across your face!" As she continued to scold him, he grinned unrepentantly until she said in exasperation, "If you keep on giving away your every thought, you'll never become Hokage!"

Horrified, he looked up at her. "Do you really think so?" His lower lip started to tremble and he looked too adorable for her to be mad at him for long. She leaned down and tousled his hair. "Well, if you work on it, you might become Hokage…" _Someday,_ she thought, privately rolling her eyes.

She offered him a hand up from where he was crouched under the benches. Still pouting at her rough treatment, he ignored her hand and stood up by himself.

A little hurt by his rejection, she withdrew her hand. This was the first time that Naruto had ever genuinely resented anything that she had done. _But then_, she reflected, _it's still his one and only ambition: to become Hokage. No wonder that he became defensive when it was ridiculed._ She ignored the pang of guilt that accompanied this thought, preferring to sit down next to him and pretend that the slight hadn't occurred.

When their ramen had arrived and Naruto had consumed 3 bowls already, she turned to him and regarded him seriously. He looked a little silly, slurping up the remaining broth with a little bit of noodle on his face. She smiled; _he still seems like a little kid. More like a little brother than anywhere near my age. _

When Naruto turned to see her smiling at him, he nearly fell out of his chair at the benevolent look on her face. Mostly the expressions that he saw from her were those of annoyance or anger. The softness in her eyes was entirely new to him. Thrown off balance, he nervously cleared his throat.

"So… what did you want to talk to me about besides Hinata liking me?"

"Oh, umm…. right!" She concentrated, not wanting Naruto to misunderstand like he did so often. "Well, the thing you should know about Hinata is that… You should be very gentle with Hinata, she's not… well."

"What?" Naruto asked, confused. _She had seemed perfectly fine to me… Besides, of course, the fainting. Oh…_ Now he understood, "Is she like those goats?"

Sidetracked despite her best efforts, Sakura asked curiously, "Goats?"

"Yeah, you know those goats that up and faint when they get surprised or anxious. Does she have that same illness?"

Sakura started to sweat. _How can I explain this one?!_


	2. Chapter 2

At that very moment, Neji Hyuuga, member of the Hyuuga family, was on a mission.

To find Hinata to deliver Kiba's message. Normally he wouldn't have considered honoring the dog-boys request to be a glorified courier to deliver the message that he would meet her at Ichiraku's the next afternoon to discuss the new Team 8 with her, but Hinata was a special case.

Rounding the 16th corner he had searched looking for her, Neji stopped when he saw his cousin curled up on the floor. He instinctively checked for assailants. No such luck. He hadn't expected any, but it would have been nice to have some excuse to vent the anger pent up from dealing with some arrogant slime-balls that had challenged him for the favor of the clan head. Just because he had been branch family, they had thought he was weak. (He kicked their asses of course, but he was still angry about it.)

He rolled his eyes and gently poked Hinata in the ribs with his foot. Getting no response, he sighed, crouched to pick her up, and froze when her hand clamped around his ankle with a grip of iron. He slowly turned his head to see… that she was still asleep.

He heaved a sigh of relief. It would not have been good if Hinata (or her father for that matter) had realized he had a soft spot for his shy younger cousin. Hinata would have stammered and not believed him, further developing her emotional abuse, while Hiashi probably would have either killed them both or forced them to marry. He was unpredictable that way. But either way, that would have severely curtailed his ability to defend Hinata-sama from the worst of their father's rages. Sadly, he couldn't prevent Hinata from believing his uncle's putdowns. But he could prevent what would inevitably happen if Hiashi saw the "defenseless" Hinata – he scowled at the imprisoning hand that was still encircling his ankle- he would definitely go ballistic. He would lecture her about how Hyuuga's are supposed to be strong, fierce and victorious. "Not defenseless mice." He would say in an icy tone that was worse than if he had shouted.

Neji's attention was brought back from imagining what would happen next was Hinata's grip shifted as she murmured in her sleep, "Naruto-kun," and turned pink. With a huff of disgust, 'Naruto is so unworthy of her', he picked her up in a fireman's hold. And turned around to come face-to-face with Hiashi himself.

Panicking inwardly, he dropped into a deep bow, dropping Hinata as he did so. She moaned, a sound that made him wince behind the curtain of his long hair, and fell back to sleep. Hiashi paused and looked discompassionatly at his sleeping daughter. He turned to Neji, prepared himself for a reprimand, as he was interfering in what Hiashi thought of as "toughening up" Hinata.  
But instead Hiashi unexpectedly bowed equally deep. While Neji was an admitted genius, as a branch member that had the seal on his forehead, he was not accorded much respect by the main house members. So this was an unexpected honor for him to be accorded such a deep bow by the Clan Head.  
Straightening up, Hiashi nodded to Neji and said, "Thank you for taking care of my daughter. She must be a burden for you." But before Neji could even think to voice a protest that she was not a burden, Hiashi turned the corner and disappeared from view. Stunned, Neji stood there stupidly, reviewing the actions that Hiashi could have seen. From his point of view, Neji would have kicked her, Hinata had grabbed onto him, and he snorted in disgust and slung her over his shoulder. Perfectly allowable actions for a branch member. He heaved a belated sigh of relief. His façade of indifference towards Hinata was intact. On reflection, today Hiashi seemed relatively sane. Or maybe it was just that he had given up on his eldest daughter for now. It was hard to tell.

Simultaneously, Team 8 was meeting their new teammate for the first time.  
"Alright. Kiba, Shino? Meet your new teammate, Sai."  
Kiba stared at the strange, pale boy that would be their new teammate. Oddly, the boy pulled out a book from his backpack and started to flip through it. He stared as he found a page, read it, and...  
Produced a brilliant smile. "Pleased to meet you," Sai said as he smiled blindingly.  
Shino's bugs started to hum in agitation and Akamaru's hackles rose as he smelled the utter lack of emotion hormones that the boy gave off. But if Kiba hadn't known that Akamaru's nose had never deceived him, he would have been fooled into thinking that Sai was actually glad to meet them.  
Kurenai, uneasy at the silence, waited for Shino and Kiba to introduce themselves and was surprised when neither of them did so. Kiba she could understand, as the boy tended to like or detest people based to first impressions; he had no qualms about being rude; but she would have expected better from Shino, who had been raised in a extremely formal clan. Even if they were upset that this was the replacement for Hinata, she was shocked by the level of animosity they were leveling against the new boy. 'Hokage-sama, I hope you know what you're doing.'  
Clearly the introductions would be up to her. She cleared her throat and said awkwardly into the silence, "And this is Kiba Inuzuka and Shino Aburame. The Inuzuka are equal participants with the dogs they are partnered with. And the Aburame…"  
"Are partners with many arthropods, I know." Shino raised an eyebrow, impressed. Not many shinobi knew the scientific name for invertebrates with exoskeletons, such as bugs. Not to mention that he had guts to interrupt Kurenai-sensei. "I have researched them since some of their chakra-absorbing insects have the potential to defeat my ink works."  
Again flipping through his book, Sai said in a monotone, obviously reading from the book, "Pleased to meet you." Curious, Kurenai peered over his shoulder. The title of the book was "Meeting New People" by Knowl Ed. Geable. Reading down the page, she saw that an entire conversation was outlined as 'Acceptable Small Talk'. The second step was to 'compliment them. It doesn't matter what except to avoid undesirable remarks* - see Ch 12.' She watched, fascinated, as he did exactly as instructed. Obviously casting about for something to compliment, his eyes lit on Shino's sunglasses. Only those who knew him well would be able to tell that behind the expressionless face that Shino was tensing in anticipation of inquiry that he felt sure that was soon to come.  
"Your sunglasses are very functional." Sai said with every sign that he felt this was a compliment.  
"…Thank you… You are the first one to say so."  
An awkward silence fell over the clearing, except for the normal sounds of the forest.  
"I'm the pack leader here, just so you know," Kiba said abruptly.  
Sai smiled again. "Of course you are," he said. Not in a discernibly patronizing tone, but the words sounded that way.  
Kurenai felt a tingle of fore-warning. This did not bode well for the new team.

As they left the training ground an hour later, Kiba was almost foaming at the mouth. "Did you see the way that little shit smiled after he executed that last move? I would swear that he was glad to get me."  
"Hardly surprising, after the way you acted back there," Shino observed. He was not nearly as incensed as Kiba was. He found the new team member to be interesting, especially after Sai had revealed his knowledge of insects in the practice matches that Kurenai had asked for to gauge their new member's strength. He was not nearly as good a tactician as Shino, but was even stronger than Kiba.  
"And did you see his shirt! He must be gay, there's no other explanation for it. What self-respecting male would wear a belly shirt!" Kiba continued to rant, his anger hardly diminished by Shino's subtle reproof.


End file.
